Happy School Holidays to you Bay Kids Whanau, may there be rest and restoration for you amidst the chaos at home as you enjoy a break from lunchboxes and a change in rhythms.
I get a little bit of a nerdy thrill when my experience in the education world overlaps with my current thinking around formation and discipleship. As I've been reading the ‘Practising The Way’ book a familiar concept called ‘scaffolding’ leapt off the page (p121). John Mark Comer writes this: “Learning theorists frame apprenticeship as a four-stage training process:
I do; you watch
I do; you help
You do; I help
You do; I watch”
In teaching we know this process is how we can ensure that a new skill is taught well. A way of modelling and transferring the learning so that the learner has been well engaged and now feels as if they have autonomy.
In parenting we know this process as a series of lessons in our own patience and anxiety and eventually we end up with a teenager and we learn the art of letting go. And there's risk involved as we learn - the very real risk of a teenager, who was not that long ago just 3 years old and so super cute, driving down the driveway by themselves out onto an actual road with actual cars.
The goal here is undoubtedly independence and driving. The scaffolding process has been modelled perfectly albeit by the more calm, rational parent and the outcome is of course hopeful success. It is, as the experts tell me, just a matter of trusting the process and actually allowing the ‘apprentice’ to move through the process themselves. It is not easy.
This same parenting anxiety and learning process happened when they were much younger, with learning to pour the milk by themselves for breakfast, gaining very wobbly balance on a two-wheeler, and climbing gingerly backwards down questionable steps.
I wonder if Jesus felt the same combination of pride and hesitation as His disciples slowly moved from following Him, to watching Him, then trying to help Him out… tentatively over time. Did He feel some relief when they started to do ‘the Jesus stuff’ themselves, like watching unsteady first steps?
Did His disciples, as apprentices, relish the feedback, leaning into the process, taking notes and going again with great gusto until they were just wildly sent out to continue what Jesus had started in His name and mighty power?
Particularly in Team Bay Junior, we seem to have taken great ownership and enthusiasm in praying for Gabriel, the child we sponsor through World Vision. There's an actual developmental sweet spot here at this age for championing the cause of justice, and there's also a strong desire to master skills, any skills - and so teaching prayer through the four-stage training process is not only optimal in this age group but it can be a great joy.
Our children have seen and heard prayer, they've been part of prayer, and now they not only lead prayer themselves with some prompts, they lead as I stand back and witness them praying for each other with boldness and confidence. There has been a beautiful gradual shift in their ownership of prayer, not only for Gabriel, but for those around them too.
It has been so lovely to see this exemplified in our time together at SPARKS, our Bay Kids Prayer Meeting (which we aim to have twice a term, so I’ll keep you posted on when that is happening again in Term 4).
If you haven't yet joined us on a Sunday from 4-5pm, this is a general rundown of what you can expect, if everything goes to plan, and why we do it:
We open with quieting and calming our bodies, readying ourselves to be in God’s presence, and then we share in the familiar gathering prayer of our Sunday Morning Service - this just sorts our sillies out and reminds us of why we're here together:
And then we sing. Jen starts us with a fun praise song with enthusiastic energetic actions and then we move into a more worshipful spacious time.
We finish Worship with the practice of thanksgiving, simply - what's something you can praise God for, or thank Him for right now? With the invitation to be brave and say this out loud, using hands up or just calling it out
Next we move into a time called ‘Listening to God Time’, where we picture Jesus with us and practice listening to His voice and waiting on Him. We share whether we felt something, or heard something, had a picture in our minds, or had a special ‘remember verse’ come to mind. It's really precious to hear what God is whispering to his children.
We always try to have some form of prayer activity or response that is active too. Last time we made ‘string prayers’: String prayers are helpful when we have some special people in our hearts or in our minds that we’d love to pray for and want to continue to pray for - and we just need that little bit of a reminder. String prayers help remind us because we can keep them in our Bibles or on the fridge or by our beds. We took our sparkly colourful string length and made some knots in it, 1 or 3 or more knots in it, all spaced out, and each knot represented a person we’re praying for. We shared this with our friends and prayed through our string prayers. This becomes a practical ‘on-ramp’ for continuing to build a life of intercessory prayer.
It was extra special to have the opportunity to pray for some of the adults too. Everything we practise together reinforces that “there's no Junior Holy Spirit”, there's no graduated scheme for becoming a real life pray-er. We have known prayer, the training wheels are off, and we pray with open hearts as children and God will hear us. It was very moving to look around the room and see our children praying, hands on the safe spot up by the upper arm, locked into the familiar ‘drainpipe’ position of our scaffolding practice open to receive and hear for another. “Come Holy Spirit”, eyes open and watching, checking and going again.
And I am refreshed just to be in the room, near the faith and trust of children, honest and direct in their language, carrying the freedom to give it a go and immediately boldly practise what they’ve learnt. As adults, we may be the ones who have made the space for our children to pray. We may be leading the moment, scaffolding the next steps, and creating the opportunities - But they lead us in terms of their faith and trust. They model to us the heart of a willing apprentice.
Many blessings on you and your little Jesus apprentices. Thank you for showing them the stuff, including them in, and bravely letting them give it a go. May we continue to learn how to long for bold soft hearts.
Arohanui, Charlotte Buxton
Associate Pastor
